When you die, your ghost enters a state of ignorance/denial until your family performs your rites and you go on to become a kami. Many Japanese people believe this yet it has no basis in Shinto literature. How did this happen? What does it mean? And is it wrong to believe this?
First, let me explain traditional Chinese Confucian burial rites. Shǒu líng (守靈) is a Chinese term for the process of deathbed rites. If a person is dying, it's common to try and perform this traditional rite if the occasion allows. Once the person dies, especially if they're an elder, the family prays for them to move on, and thus avoid lingering as a ghost. They will pray, leave offerings, show respect by avoiding the colors red, yellow, and brown and mourn the person's passing. Ancestors are considered to be godlike and to watch over and guard the family... This is very similar to a concept of an ujigami.
What I'm doing by saying this is illustrating that the modern Japanese custom about death is a Sinicization, primarily founded in Confucian ancestor worship, that results in the belief that all of the dead become Kami. Traditionally to become a kami you would need to be a king, emperor, high-ranking member of society worshiped for your contributions to Japan. This is seen in Emperor Meiji and how the Meiji Jinja receives massive attendance year after year. Similarly, the Kami-sama Tenjin is a kami originating as a man named Sugawara no Michizane in the 9th Century AD. His soul was vengeful after being shamed and exiled by the Fujiwara clan's actions. Hence, the reigning Emperor burnt the exile order and restored his honor, allowing him to become a kami. No normal person can achieve this, let's be honest. It's comforting analgesia to believe our parents and others before us are worthy of this, but it takes an exceptional soul, and an exceptional man or woman, to become a kami. It may seem unfair that I'm saying this, but I don't go by academic attempts to sanitize religion and history.
The world cannot be decompiled in that manner. Some things are as they are for a reason. Clearly the works of Shinto's past, such as the Kojiki are as they are not just a mythological text. They're also not a bible. But somewhere in between, the majority of the early chapters are composed of acts by the Kami-sama of the heavens. To claim Takamagaharea is Korea (we don't know that the Yayoi are Korean in origin even!) or that Yomi-no-Kuni is some kind of cave is a stupid proposition by stuffy atheist academics. Japan is a secularized country, and the entirety of its educational institutions reflect this because it's Western customs that dominate politics and academics.
How did this happen? It's because of a simple cultural blending, as well as to some degree an artifact of Kokka Shinto. Kokka Shinto being a highly nationalist form of Shinto, it was inevitable that the people manipulating the likes of Emperor Meiji, Taisho and Showa saw it advantageous to spread this conception to the masses to encourage militarism of Japan. But it's also a case of how an idea simply appeals. It's clear from the early days of Shinto it had a conception of ancestor worship, though likely one very different. The orginal has been lost, and replaced entirely with a Sinified system influenced strongly by Confucianism.
Is it wrong to believe this? No. But it's important to understand that just because something is common/widespread doesn't make it true or correct. Free Parking in Monopoly does nothing in the original rules, but everyone has played the house rule of money pooled into it. Does that change facts? No. Does it make it bad to do it? Not necessarily. We are unworthy of rewards just for living. That's a value present in Shinto from the beginning.
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